Pillars of Intentional Motherhood
As mothers, regardless of our backgrounds, there comes a moment, or many, where we're confronted with our child's overpowering emotions. Questions emerge:
How can I console my distressed child?
How can I maintain connection during their emotional storms?
Why do their emotional outbursts deeply affect me?
Rest assured, if you're grappling with these questions, you're not isolated in your journey. Contrary to the pristine images of motherhood on social media, reality is often more complex. Our children, in their emotional rawness, not only challenge us but also catalyze our profound personal growth.
Introducing the Five Pillars of Intentional Motherhood
Slow to Speak, Quick to Listen:
Understanding: Children's emotions are more intense and immediate than ours. Acknowledge this before responding.
Action Step: Pause briefly. Actively listen, breathe, and select your words thoughtfully.
Insight: Embody empathy by seeing things from their perspective. It can reshape your reactions.
Attunement:
Understanding: This is about emotional alignment with your child, ensuring they feel cherished and acknowledged.
Action Step: Regularly spend one-on-one time with your child, delving into their emotional world.
Insight: Activities like reading or sketching together can open doors to heartfelt conversations.
Containment:
Understanding: A child's emotional eruptions can be swift and startling. Your role is to be their consistent anchor.
Action Step: Affirm their feelings, making them feel seen and understood.
Insight: A simple, comforting touch can communicate your unwavering support.
Self-Regulation:
Understanding: Equip your child with strategies to navigate their emotions in constructive ways.
Action Step: Introduce methods like deep breathing or mental imagery to aid during intense feelings.
Insight: Designate a "serenity spot" in your home, a refuge for when emotions escalate.
Story Work:
Understanding: Reflect on your own reactions, discerning the past narratives or beliefs fueling them.
Action Step: Keep a journal to identify recurring triggers.
Insight: If specific memories or patterns become overwhelming, consider working with me: Somatic Story Work.
Your Unique Path in Motherhood
While these pillars guide the journey, every mother's experience in motherhood is distinctively her own. Engage with your personal narrative as you embrace the tenets of intentional motherhood. And if ever you feel adrift in the vast sea of emotions and experiences, remember: I am here to guide and accompany you. Engaging with your story not only transforms you but enriches the bond with your child.
Practical Application
Visualize this: Your toddler is in distress, craving something they cannot have. Their emotions spiral into a tantrum. How do you apply the pillars in this instance?
First, take a deep breath and process the scenario.
Engage with compassion, recognizing their deep-seated need.
Suggest calming activities, like a walk outside, allowing them to reconnect with the soothing embrace of nature.
Though challenging, these moments sow the seeds of trust and a lifelong bond.
Motherhood: A Divine Dance of Grace and Faith
Embarking on motherhood is both a profound challenge and an affirmation of our faith. While the path is never perfect, the beauty lies in genuine presence and connection. With Christ as our guide, we are equipped to navigate every twist and turn.
Whenever you seek deeper insights or tailored guidance, please reach out. I'm here, standing beside you in your journey.
Warmly,
Lilie Duncan
